Tuesday, April 03, 2007

You can keep your 'society'
Music: none


You know what it has taught me, apart from to repeat myself, because it never changes? It's that i'm useless. valueless and excluded from this world. I am invisible, forgotten on the daily agenda and assignments at work, also on our sign in and out sheets... I spend money on bus and train fares that no conductor ever asks to see except from those around me to the extent that my flatmate has begun to think she is talking to herself so obvious is it that I am not 'here'. Yes, I know I am small but this is fucking taking the piss I have become an 'invisible friend' . We almost fell out as she tried to calm me down because I was getting very angry at people walking through me, bumping me and she stated this is how shit is... you 'go with the flow of traffic' and you don't bump into or be bumped because they are not going to, and don't need to, get out of your way. I informed her at almost 36 I am fucking done with it being me 'getting out of everyone elses' way like I have done all my life like I should bow and be grateful to be aknowledged, exist at all.

God fucking dammit I am angry and frustrated to tears with this fuck.

3 Comments:
Anonymous Anonymous said...

but i still love you. =)

5:52 AM  
Blogger gregor said...

well, my dear, it is good to see you once again.

11:48 PM  
Blogger mD said...

*huggles Nikki!* Thank you Gregor *grin* nice to be missed ;) Maybe I will be able to finally get my ass in here more often now lol! sheeeeeeeesh!

3:26 AM  

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lurking: online
date: March.27.09
mood: Low..
thinking: people....
drinking: coke zero
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